Miss Motivator

If someone said to me “what is your ideal weight?” I would tell them 66/67kg – because that is what I was told my ideal weight would be!

I have been sitting on 70kg for quite a few months now and getting under it, is just not happening – I had two thoughts about this;

1) If I was much stricter on my diet, measuring food, counting calories etc, I would be there (but that is REALLY not my style!)

2) Maybe I am at my ideal weight, I just need to decrease the body fat!

SO today I had a “Body Composition and Cellular Health Analysis”

And boy oh boy! I walked away happy

My ideal weight, for my “large” frame… IS 70kg!

I have slightly too much body fat, talking about 2.5% (I tell you now, it’s all in the thighs, hahah) and slightly under muscle – once those two balance out,  I will be technically “perfect”

I know I know, it doesn’t REALLY matter, but it’s nice to know that I don’t belong in the 60kg+ category and I don’t need to aim for it or get upset that I am not in it.

And this one is for the ladies…

I am carrying an extra 2.5kg  of water due to my cycle -which confirms to me the constant 2-3kg fluctuation I have had to mentally battle, every month, for the last 2 years!

Any woman trying to lose weight NEEDS TO REMEMBER THIS!

What else has been amazing for me this month?

Well, after dealing with a shoulder injury/complaint/weakness, I have been seeing a top health clinic Naturopath guy that is doing wonders – I feel stronger in my shoulders and have been attempting some pull ups on the band… I picked up the 16kg kettle-bell… I did a little rope climbing this week and this morning I picked up the 6.5kg wall ball instead of the 5kg.

Not arm related, but I did some 24inch box jumps, without all the doubt/fear that used to plague me big time!

Sunday just gone, I revisited the Hillarys Triathlon and beat my time from April by 9minutes 40seconds … still have HUGE improvements to make in my cycle, I reckon another 10 minutes would see me flying along.

AND

I ran 10km yesterday, no orthotics, no knee pain, no tight hips/ITB

After feeling a bit down and out about stagnating weight and always needing modified workouts…  I am ending this year on a positive note and looking forward to a kick arse 2012!!!

I am turning 30 in January and whilst the digits themselves aren’t so appealing, I will feel fitter, faster, stronger, healthier, happier at 30 (heck, even at 40 I reckon!), then I did at 21…

(oh and look… I even wore my above the knee tri shorts this time!)

Just came back from the BEST HOLIDAY I have ever had!

There was no relaxing, no drinking, no swimming (well, sorta) and no crackers and cheese BUT there were some amazing people all headed out to dig deep and experience something that not everyone will get the opportunity to experience.

Bootcamp… Commando Steve style. You know, the spunky Crossfitting Commando dude from The Biggest Loser Australia.

I was going to give some details of the weekend, but it would kinda ruin the fun. ( http://themillgym.com/photos-2 you can view some pics here, you need to find “The Commando/theMill Training Camp WA November 2011)

If you are a little lost with knowing who you are, wondering where you stand with your friends, suffer self esteem issues, question your ability, want to work on a few personal weaknesses (just as you would physical) and test your physical/mental toughness… then  you need to take a soul searching holiday that will see you doing pushups and squats for stuffing up, or taking too long or just because!

Throughout the camp, I kept thinking of a few blog posts I had done…. Choose the Wrench, Digging Deep, Need a Teaspoon of Concrete, Interesting People, What are you teaching your kids, alltheshityoulikefit and Lose Weight Find Yourself… (plus heaps of others)

I was experiencing in one weekend what I had learnt throughout 18months of weightloss and 2 years of getting fit.

After less then 48 hours, I had made some great friends. We were all there for different, yet similar reasons and after going through a bit of hell together -we were all sad that it came to an end

I mean, imagine seeing someone expose their fear of heights in front of people they have known for less then 24 hours. Picture hearing the verbalised mental battle of someone concurring their fears, and hearing stories of what people learnt about themselves after a challenging drill.

I always had respect for those in the military (past and present) but after getting a very small taste of what they physically and mentally experience and the camaraderie and the trust they must put into the hands of others, was just eye opening.

Huge credit to all trainers that organised this bootcamp and came along for the weekend, their comments assuring me, telling me I did something well, or correct some technique or confirm something I already knew, just meant a lot to me.

To be honest, it’s really inspiring to see these guys be SO POSITIVE mentally, they have been through some amazing adventures and while they regularly have on their poker face, they are the most positive people I have met, seriously.

They don’t question their ability, doubt themselves or put crap on themselves. They are confident, positive and encouraging.

The fellow who inspired my blog entry for “Choose the Wrench” (http://missmotivator.armabloggin.com/?p=478#comment-81) found my link and commented on my post (I feel a little honoured) – it took me back to April 2011 when I couldn’t run 10km and was fretting over the Saturday morning circuit class!

Wow, how things have changed in just a matter of 6 months! I can run 10km, even took on a Half Marathon and I stopped finding Circuit a challenge (yes, it was still tough, but not challenging… Get it?!) and Crossfit was calling me BIG TIME! I have now been at Crossfit for a few weeks and loving it.

I still have heaps of injuries (misuse of muscles, haha) but I am still out there doing it.

I just want to repost these amazing words:  Choose the Wrench

When the challenge, the fight, the slap in the face…becomes a welcome visitor. When you learn to SEE the challenge instead of the calamity or the hardship, and love it.  That’s when you’re ready.  That’s when you are able and willing to shift into what Josh Everett calls his “other gear.”  It’s that state where the pain is there, you feel it, but it doesn’t matter.  You’re above it.  You’re now refusing to be broken, and this is when you realize that you can run a little faster or hit a triple instead of a single.  Just decide to do it, it’s that simple.

This is not just for those training and sitting in their comfort zone, this is for those who have that desire to run -but make excuses, those who have weight to lose -but it all just seems too hard, those who want to join in at the gym -but it’s all a bit daunting, those who want to want to make changes -but fear the sweat and pain!

Get sick of being overweight and uncomfortable, get sick of wearing clothes several sizes above your “ideal weight”, get sick of holding back from doing fun things with your kids because your confidence is bashed with your belly!

I am turning 30 in January and I will be in my prime of fitness! I will have been Crossfitting for a few months, training for the Swim (1.9km) and Run (21.1) legs of the Half Ironman and would have just completed an Olympic distance (1.5km/40km/10km) triathlon!

I also feel I should celebrate the fact, that I have just passed the two year mark of when I started this ‘weight loss life gain’ mission -

I think back to all the attempts in the past with home delivered meals, eating salads, meal replacement shakes, TV shopping weighloss miracle products and half hearted attempts at exercise…

I knew I had to lose weight, it just took me awhile to find what worked FOR ME.

FOR ME that was making the decision to do this for myself. Relying on friends to make training a priority wasn’t working. I had to start rocking up to training and group fitness classes on my own.

I had to start breaking a sweat and breaking through all comfort zones.

Slowly, but surely, my diet improved and the rest is history.

That’s right… Diet and exercise. Not shakes, pills, gimmicks.

(Thanks to Amy for this great before and after arrangement for me!)

This before pic is from December 2006, before children, but one of the only decent full length pictures of me that I am willing to release to the public. I was about 94ish kilos and 14/16 clothing.

I was 95/96 kilos in September 2009, size 16/18… the month I started doing personal training.

The other two after shots are from September 2011 – I am ranging clothes size 8/12 depending on what it is and how skinny they want to make the legs on pants!

(oh and this my first ever little black dress… or even a dress that comes above the knee It had to be with stockings, but hey, it’s an improvement)

Thought I should blog about this pretty big milestone of mine…

Yep, I ran 21km on the  25th September 2011 – I ran it very slowly, but I just wanted to see if I could make the distance.

It was two years ago I couldn’t run 30 seconds.

It was just months ago, my knees wouldn’t let me run 2kms without the pain being so intense, I had to stop.

I really wish I did better in the time, but with literally no training beforehand – except a 16km run the weekend prior, which was a test for my knees and also a test to see if I could make the distance and recover ok…

My “official” race time was 2:33 and supposed to be 21.1km – but I like my Runkeeper version better -

21.33 km run
Duration 2:32:27 | Calories Burned 1711
Average Pace 7:09 / km | Average Speed 8.39 km/h | Elevation Climb 222 m

My pace was actually quite ok in the begining, but 12km in, I started questioning my sanity

12-16km were my biggest head battles

I overcame them… then I nearly cried because I JUST KEPT RUNNING and didn’t let those voices tear me down. I felt strong mentally, but totally weak physically.

I was overtaken by a 70 year old woman at 18km, I got back in front, then she took me again and I just couldn’t keep up… she is apparently a seasoned runner and has probably done a handful of Half Marathons this year alone, so I don’t feel too bad… but it is kinda funny!

The last 1km was the longest kilometre of my life. I just wanted it to end and the finish line seemed so far away!

I got choked up seeing my husband and kids at the finish line… My son didn’t want to hold my hand – he wanted to race me! So I had to find that “sprint finish” in me and keep ahead of my 4 year old, haha

My daughter took off down the chute too, I was pretty proud of that.

Despite my exhaustion, dehydration and overwhelming emotion, I took in that little moment where I hugged my kids at the finish line.

Unfortunately I walked past my husband in a daze because my eyes spotted the water bottle I hid near the finish line, haha!

I wanted to cry because I just ran 21km… I wanted to cry because I was nearly last (thank god for the 80 year old runners and the walkers, hehehe)… I just wanted to cry because I was stupidly proud and  frustrated at the same time.

NEVER AGAIN were the first words I spoke, but it was mere hours (after a nap, water and food) that I was planning the next one.

Events are recording “record numbers”, triathlons are having to cap numbers and one I attended last year was a sell out, for the first time ever – more and more people are running or joining up with bootcamps, sweating it off instead of going to sleep hoping it will fall off in the morning – The Biggest Loser has seen major transformations and amazing looking people step out of bodies that hid every dimple and any gorgeous facial feature!

People are getting sick of feeling so uncomfortable in their skin and when you FINALLY accept that slow and steady weight loss the best thing ever and clean eating is a long term achievement over short term diets, shakes or soups, things get a bit easier

On Tuesdays my son attends a community Kindy program – it only goes for two hours, but I always have a giggle at the amount of fit Mumma’s dropping off/picking up in their gym gear!

Such joy to find those spare hours to get to the gym or go for a run!

Anyway, today I ran to the Kindy (less than 2kms I think) with the idea of walking my son home on this gorgeous weather day… A few hundred metres walking with my son and he looks at me  ”want to run Mum?” -Yes… OK…

So all the way home we did little sprints -I am sure some people thought I was making my 4 year old run, but it was all him, telling me when to slow down, stop or run.

He also told me he liked running up hills (lol) and he stopped for a moment and told me he had a sore leg -”should we walk then Jake?”… “No, keep running” -this just makes me laugh, you have to be a little bit crazy to  be a runner!

He might loathe running when he is older, but I am glad that I can not only encourage, support and embrace it for the moment, but I can run with him

Couple this with my 2 year old daughter running across two soccer pitches over the weekend “Lets run to the beach” she said -I just burst with pride!

I don’t sit there and drum into my kids about running and fitness, I tell them they are strong and encourage physical activity whenever I can – usually they are wiping the sleep from their eyes when I come home red faced, out of breathe and sweaty… from going for a run or coming home from the gym!

I just want being active to be normal for them, not a chore, not something you do to lose weight, but just normal – an everyday activity to help them with stress, concentration, energy and to be healthy, physically and mentally!

OK, I admit that I have said this to my son “Are you going to be an Ironman when you are older?” -”Yes Mum”

What Mum means…                                          What Jacob means…

But I can still hope can’t I?!

Feeling a little bit nostalgic today!

Revisited the 12km Perth City to Surf – the event that really changed my life in 2010… the realisation of how much joy participating in these events can bring!

Last year I did the course in 1 hour 34 minutes – I do not have the official time yet, but my “records” i.e. Runkeeper… from today, say I did the course in 1 hour 18 minutes… I will be a happy lady if I can knock another 16 minutes of my time for 2012

No knee pain, but got niggles and decided to walk after 9kms – got bored and ran a bit more… made sure I ran up the last hills (overtaking people of course!) then powered down them (overtaking people of course!) hahaha! If I managed to achieve a average 6:23min/km pace over 12km, I can safely say I didn’t walk much at all, so really proud of that.

I love hearing that I have motivated people, it really makes my day. I could list you several people that motivated me to try running (remember… my worst form of torture at 95 kilos) – in fact, I am going to because they will be shocked… just initials for now and I am going to attempt to recall exactly what is was that stuck in my mind and made me think “maybe I COULD run”

JD “See ya next year running” -facebook status after clearly not enjoying his run

JP – a facebook update about running while its still dark and being glad no one saw her get surprised and wet by sprinklers at the park

JC – Simply just telling me that she was running and losing weight

JM – Running with work mates after work

CS – Running, losing weight and doing the Bridges or some other Perth fun run

MM – Running on the treadmill, can’t even remember if she had run 5 minutes or 20 minutes, I was just impressed it was more than 30 seconds, lol

DS: Bringing my attention to the Couch to 5km Running Program

Funnily enough, these people don’t run much now, yet they inspired me to give it a go!

Today my old trainer told me I inspired her to get back into training… I think I am extra hormonal because I just feel like crying at everything today, haha (in a good happy proud way!), working had taken priority and it was time to get her life back! I really love that I am not the best at anything, but I can motivate people too.

My old trainer changed my life, held my hand at last years City to Surf -because I was soo bloody anxious, and just gave me a love for this game. I am honoured to have returned the favour

People have seen my transformation and started their own journey, or even upped their training because they have got complacent or tried something different because of me…. This is why I want to do a personal training course – if I can motivate people just from doing this stuff, imagine how many I could motivate when I actually know what I am doing or talking about, hahah

City to Surf 2011 70kgs vs City to Surf 2010 82ish kgs  -wow wee!

Same type of running skirt, except now I wear the Small not the Large ;D

Well – today was interesting!

I am all for accepting your body type – yep, I have big legs… I can accept that… they are strong and I love that… BUT they are to be covered up.

My pants are full length or a minimum 3/4 length and the shortest things I own, come to just above the knee… which is pushing it for me, one is a dress and the other two are for swimming (because longer pants do look incredibly grandma, haha)

I don’t mind my legs, I look at them in the mirror at body balance and I admire the look, I remember what they looked like 25 kilos ago and I have dropped soooo many centimetres off them, I am proud of that…

I would never have considered myself to have body dysmorphia – until today…

Quick little pop into a shop to try on some dresses for fun… (short, tight little numbers) and I could feel my anxiety starting to peak, heart rate increasing, my palms got sweaty (actually I think I got sweaty all over), I got nervous… It’s been two hours and I STILL have palpatations in my chest!

I tried on dresses and my eyes didn’t notice the chest, arms, boobs, stomach – it went straight to the exposed (I am going to be honest) big fat disgusting legs The ones I don’t mind covered up… are totally sickening to me out in the open.

My god… I have been getting teary just writing this blog, reading about body dysmorphia and wondering what the hell am I going to do to fix it!

I had two friends with me and despite the compliments, I just wanted to %^&*ing hide ;/

You only have to watch the first minute of this clip to understand: My Body is Undesirable – the people with me were just humouring me, how can they not see what I see, they were just lying to make me feel better! There is no way I can go out in public like this!!

Now, I could say that this has come from the years of people telling me “you’re not fat” etc etc, when I really was, but even when I was young… those thighs have been covered – I have never worn anything above the knee since sometime in highschool.

I have two ways to deal with this…

1) Continue to cover up because I feel more comfortable that way – it doesn’t hurt anyone for me to wear longer dresses, long pants or whatever, it’s something I don’t really care about until confronted with exposing them…

or

2) Attempt to learn to not give a crap what people think??

I still don’t think and will not believe that my legs should be on display (without lots of psychological help anyway!) -mainly because of this point from the body dysmorphic link… Feeling self-conscious in social environments; thinking that others notice and mock their perceived defect(s).

Heck, even I have looked at some chicks in short dresses – I have noticed their big thighs and I think “I would never wear that” but I also appreciate their confidence to not care what anyone else thinks about their legs – it’s a totally strange world to me

<sigh> I just read this self test… Body Dysmorphic  Disorder Self Test and it says “Fear of Imagined Ugliness” -my first though… what if it’s not imagined… I feel like I am the only one being realistic!

I will do a positive blog post soon… feels like it’s been awhile!

On a happier note… I ran 5km without knee pain Yippee! Haha

ETA: Just remembered this post from before I did the Triathlon course… http://missmotivator.armabloggin.com/?p=111 – I really think I wouldn’t have done a triathlon if I hadn’t found 3/4 triathlon pants!

Due to the increase in challenges being delivered to me in workouts, my body just wants to disown me. My brain is in a constant battle with negative and positive thoughts.

In high school, I used to have this backpack with “No Fear” written on it, I keep trying to remember these simple words when faced with things I do actually fear!

Lets go back 20 months when I first started doing personal training…

I was a 95/96 kilo unfit woman who was still breastfeeding a 5 month old and had a two year old running around also – I gave three simple “requests” to my personal trainer

1) I don’t like lunges
2) I don’t run
3) Leave my chocolate out of this

LOL – after not being able to drink for nearly 3 years and being restricted with cold meats and soft cheeses, I thought it was fair to back off on the chocolate lectures, hahaha

After some positive re-enforcement, I took on the Couch to 5km running program, so finally moved on from the running fear myself.

Lunges made their appearance, but not a huge part of my regular routines.

My second personal trainer enters my life… I don’t like lunges… didn’t work this time! I think it was accepted as a challenge, haha!

I rarely did “normal” lunges… I was doing lunges up a hill holding dumbbells, single/double/triple bounce lunges usually holding a 5kg medicine ball in each hand

I didn’t even know you could make lunges any worse until my new trainer came along. I think I like lunges now, just not the other types, heheheh.

There are many other major whinge inducing exercises, like burpees – however, the box jump is one that not only brought whinging but fear!

When I was 4, I smashed my front tooth on the bathroom floor – I can almost still feel it, especially when I look at the huge steps used for box jumps… I learnt to do box jumps, but on the ‘little’ step.

A few weeks ago, my new personal trainer – lets call him #3, was training another client as I walked into the gym for my PT session.

She is jumping on the large step as though it’s very easy… my ****stirring personal trainer, I mean, trainer #3… convinces me, he will be using the huge box for me today.

All through my treadmill warm up walk, I can see my trainer and his other client in the window reflection… she is jumping this huge step… my brain is telling me to go “you won’t be able to do this workout, just go, she is springy, you are too big, you will not be able to jump that step, walk out that door, give yourself a break from personal training and try again in a few weeks”.

I had to dig deep to find some positive thoughts. *deep breathe* Fake it til you make it… “you can do this workout, if you do one jump your trainer will be happy, you have done one jump before, you can smash this workout, no whinging, JFDI, give it your all”

My turn for training… ****stirrer trainer then tells me I won’t be jumping the large step, just doing step ups.. WHAT a relief! Of course, he never said I would be jumping it, I just saw his other client jumping it and assumed the worst. He tells me he did this on purpose, so now that anything he gives me, will seem easy in comparison. Hahaha – I think it worked!

OKies, now back to the present – trainer #3 is away on holidays, so I am back training with #2 for a short while… and because I told her last week that she didn’t work me hard enough, I got punished yesterday.

She pulled out the large step, I swore and she still didn’t back down – she was not taking any excuses, she was upping the ante and I was going to have to face my fear…

It was a mini circuit workout, I had to do 10 box jumps x3 – EVERY single jump required sooo much inner strength. EVERY time I made it up on the box, with both feet firmly on the surface, I was relieved.

So, I have done it now, more than a once off – it still brings me fear to think about it… especially as I have seen photos of box jump battle scars.

At least I can be assured I won’t have been the first or last to have ever fallen off one!

Come to think of it… I think a bruised ego would hurt me more!! I don’t think everyone in the gym is going to yell out “RESPECT” when I stack it over the step, lol

Edited: 18.07.2011 – Read this on the “Strong is the new Skinny” facebook page

EDITED TO ADD: As much as I hated writing this blog and hated even more posting it – I have taken a look at my eating over the last week and my cheats are creeping up and up and up again.

I noticed a difference when I stopped all my vitamins etc but it’s definitely got worse with the colder weather. Food will always be a battle of mine – I can’t exercise like a mad woman forever and the kilos are going to pile back up again if I stop due to injury/age/holiday whatever.

I think I needed a wake up call! Whilst I am not eating lots of oily junky foods as such, I have got to cut the carbs and sugar!!! Breads, pasta, crackers and chocolate – totally empty foods!

—————————————————————————————

I kinda hate these exposing blog posts, but I also feel they need to be written… hopefully others can relate…

I read a blog post from Amy Waight last night and I could soo relate Read it here: 3.5 years FAST FOOD FREE!!

Whilst I was not to this extreme, I easily could have gone that way.

The last time I stood on some scales, was in 1999 – I was 70 something… I bought scales in 2002 and couldn’t believe I was soooo close to hitting triple digits.

I am still not sure how I could put on so much weight and not even realise

I truly believe eating this way is an addiction and depression issue.

I was a bit of a self harmer myself but I stopped after meeting my boyfriend (now husband) when I was 17 – I also quit smoking… perhaps the self harming moved onto food?!

If an overweight person told me they were happy with themselves and their size, I wouldn’t believe them.

When food rules your world, it’s the closet eating that is the most shameful!

But… if no one saw you do it, did it really happen!!

I could eat Hungry Jacks for lunch, then want it again for dinner (managed to avoid… but then might have had again for lunch the next day instead). I used to cringe when the same person was on drive thru that had served me the day or so before.

Unlike Amy, I did go back and try the Bacon Deluxe Burger that was my addiction… It sat in my stomach FOR HOURS. I had it at lunch time and by night time I couldn’t sleep. This food would not digest. I had to ……. it up and fell asleep straight away afterwards. My body totally rejected this food after not having it for so long.

I still sometimes think it would be nice to have one, but I just know my body will refuse. The thought of that disgusting plastic cheese melted over greasy meat, quickly makes me change my mind about another taste!

Kind of like when you quit smoking… you might be tempted months or years later and that god awful ash taste, head spins and coughing comes back to you!! I think it’s something we continue doing for whatever reason and the body learns to love it.

I am currently considering the Paleo diet – my husband and kids can’t eat dairy anyway and my daughter is showing signs of being a carb addict like her Mum.

I only serve bread packed full of grains and seeds and cook spelt pasta to make it a little healthier, but getting rid of it all together would be the best way.

Pretty hard to introduce a meat/vegetable/nuts and seeds diet to a 2 and nearly 4 year old! But we are going to make a few changes and just like the weight loss, slow and steady will get us there!

If food rules your world, I beg you to take a look at what you are doing to your body… just like a smoker, drinker, drug addict or self harmer – eating shitty greasy sugary foods, on a daily or regular basis is abusing your body.

It’s a hard addiction to break because you do need to eat to fuel your body, so the temptation is always there. The convenience of drive thru, the ads, the addictive salt/flavourings… I know I know…. ;(

I just walked past lots of healthy sandwiches in a gourmet shop and got the creamy pasta… I feel sluggish and bloated. I need to remember this feeling!

Ok, so… the weight loss goals are pretty much gone, losing weight was the easy bit… now it’s upping the ante on my fitness goals… I have big aspirations (well, big for a mere mortal like myself!)

Nearly two weeks ago, I had a one hour personal training session with my new PT that broke me, mentally more than physically!

Physically, I didn’t experience one day of DOMS (Delayed Onset of Muscle Soreness), so therefore probably didn’t work hard enough, lol, I nearly came close to throwing up, more from the cardio aspect where I pushed myself very hard… but mentally… it’s been nearly two weeks and I am still annoyed about and disappointed in the negative thoughts that consumed me.

While the major workout that broke me, were individually relatively simple exercises, putting the three of them together was hard as f^&*! Not sure if the PT was humouring me or not, but even he rated 8/10 on the degree of difficulty. I couldn’t complete the workout he had set for me.

I was broken!

In my defence, I was taking off for a holiday the next day and stressing over it all (two young kids and planes are a traumatic experience, lol) but I was left wondering if I have delusions of grandeur and that I am way over my head in attempting to reach the fitness goals that I have set for myself.

Since that workout, I have had a holiday with the family and nearly two weeks of no gym or running or anything remotely breaking a sweat.

I have realised and accepted that my body is going to be pushed through a lot of new pain thresholds in the future to reach the goals that I want to achieve.

Therefore, if I want to succeed at these… I need to HTFU and JFDI

(don’t read if you don’t like reading about babies being born, lol)

I have delivered both my children “naturally” and drug free. What did it take for me to complete that?

Total focus; on breathing and believing that I could do this – not wasting valuable energy on complaining and negative thoughts!!

My pain relief?

The ‘occasional’ swearing… and turning my husbands hand purple… but that’s beside the point, haha ;D

Lets hope I can incorporate this ‘simple’ technique into some more gruelling workouts and walk away knowing that I gave it my all!

While I may not always succeed at the workouts… my new PT is not really one to set me workouts I can complete without a major challenge… my improvements will be seen over time!

Wish me luck
x